In these tough economic times, with so many skilled, talented and experienced workers sitting idle hoping for a foot in the employment door, I have been floored by the myriad of stories regarding interviews with and job postings from company hiring managers.
I have read countless stories from countless job board forums about the requirements for potential job candidates and more specifically, the position itself.
There seems to be an almost deliberate attempt by companies to list impossible (…or laughable at the very least) requirements for a position. Here’s an example:
Are you a tech-savvy person with great communication skills? Do you enjoy solving problems in unconventional ways? Do you like gadgets and cool tools to make work easier? Are you a former Web project manager looking to make a move into new media?
We are currently looking for a qualified candidate for a Media Technology Analyst position.
This position would include, but is not limited to:
• Project management
• Research and test new business and media technologies
• Development of new products.
• Train employees on new and existing software
• Create efficiencies in new or current processes through the use of technology.
* Bachelors Degree or higher
• Former project management experience
• Excellent organizational and analytical skills
• Strong technical background, with the ability to learn complex technical concepts on the fly.
• Strong attention to detail, ability to multi-task and follow-through projects to completion.
• Strong communicator.
• Able to react to change productively.
• Great team player
We are looking for candidates with degrees from the following degree types, but not limited to:
New Media, Interactive Media, MultiMedia Design, Web Development, Database Management, Software Development, Graphic Design.
Experience in the following areas.
• XML/Data Integration
• Creative Suite software.
Hourly compensation based on required experienced. ($11-14hr)
This posting is fantasy land…a great example of insanity turned loose on all of us looking for work.
Any person that could even remotely provide ONE HALF of the skills listed in this posting would command somewhere in the neighborhood of $75-100k a year. A company couldn’t OUTSOURCE a job with these requirements for the insulting, meager pay they somehow have the testicular fortitude to actually list. Now, transfer this madness to damned near every job posting out there. I’ve honestly seen job postings for trash collectors that require at least an Associate’s degree. I kid you not. Peruse your local state labor department job boards and be prepared to slam your head into the keyboard over and over again. You can expect to find jobs ranging from minimum wage to mind-blowing $13hr careers.
The poverty level in this country has fallen to such a level that a single person’s poverty level is now $11k a year and a family of 4 is just under $23k a year. Do you see what’s happening here? Re-adjust the poverty level to reflect the recession and $13hr looks pretty appealing to the damned near everyone. However, consider the single young professional that might somehow be relatively qualified for the above position. This person, no doubt, holds some amount of student loan debt. Now think about other debts this single person has, to include:
Rent/Mortgage – $800mo
Auto Payment – $250mo
Utilities – $300mo
Insurance – $100mo
Credit/Loan – $500-1000mo
We are already talking well over $2100mo just to meet the essentials. Notice how I didn’t calculate food, gas, clothing, and other payouts that come along? A job position that pays $13hr can’t possibly cover the expenses of daily, real world living. Sure, you can reduce rent by living in an apartment the size of a jail cell or do without some luxuries like food briefly. And this is a simple formula for a single person. Imagine those with children! But what kind of life is this…for anyone? The world around us is structured in such a way that you are kept in a ‘poverty spiral’. You’ll be allowed to earn just enough (or not enough in most cases) to pay many of your bills and keep a little bit of food in your belly. But, you can rest assured that saving any money is rarely possible. So, this keeps you in line and part of the system.
We are told by the ‘halo polishers’ that we should be thankful that we HAVE a job and that we should take 2 or 3 jobs if we have other financial obligations. As if finding 2 or 3 jobs is as simple as strolling into a fast food joint or a call center and taking your pick of all those empty chairs! It’s damned near impossible to find ONE job in this economic environment, let alone three! Reality has no place in these people’s lives. Reality has nothing to do with hiring managers and their desire to hire, humiliate and over-work their ‘gold standard’ new crop of American cogs for their massive, greedy, ugly wheels. And regarding those ‘halo polishers’ that have all the answers for us poor, wretched, ‘to-be-looked-down-upon and-pitied’… I hear from them everyday. They have no idea of what we’re going through out here. They all might be well reminded of the old qoute:
“…be nice to people on your way UP, because you’ll meet them on the way down”…Wilson Mizner